Life before knowing Christ
I grew up with a workaholic father
who was not always around, even on the important events of my life like
graduation. My two
brothers also had independent lives and we did not grow up together. I was dependent on my mom for a lot of
things, we were inseparable. Growing up I was looking for happiness from other
people or material things. I get easily jealous when my friends had other close friends. My happiness was dependent on other people. I also had insecurities/pressures
on being compared to the success of my brothers.
How I came to know Jesus
In 2001, I experienced
occasional headaches and was diagnosed of Open Angle Glaucoma on both eyes. Glaucoma
affects people of all ages and is the leading cause of blindness in the world.
Glaucoma is a disease in your eye that damages your optic nerve. To put it
simply, the white fluid that keeps your eye healthy is unable to properly drain
and causes pressure to build, which can result in blindness. My eye pressure
before was around 20 to 25.
During that
time, I did not have a dedicated doctor who can closely monitor my glaucoma,
because of the distance of the hospital from my place. For the first five
years, I was prescribed around 5 to 6 eye drops that I had to take several
times during the day. Because of the medications, my eye pressure was lowered
down to 15 to 20.
In 2005, my
mom and I went to Australia to visit our relatives and also have a second
opinion with regards to my condition. Felt hopeless when the doctor there
informed us that in 5 to 15 years, I could lose my eyesight completely. We
stayed there for two months and we got to experience having a spiritual family
because my Tita was very active in her local church. It was during one of their
gatherings, that my Tita prayed for me and my mom and it was during that moment
that we felt the presence of the Holy Spirit.
Life after accepting Christ as my Lord and Savior
When we got
back from Australia, I was invited by a friend from college to attend Victory
Christian Fellowship. I became active in Kids Church and Youth ministry.
Early 2008,
I decided to look for a doctor within the area who can easily go to regularly. By
God’s grace, I was able to find an ophthalmologist in Borough Eastwood and
underwent the Glaucoma Filtration Procedure. In August 2008, I attended Victory
Weekend and was baptized with the Holy Spirit. Eventually, I started sharing
the gospel through one2one.
In 2009, I
was in a relationship with a non-believer and it became my primary focus. My parents took very good care of me
through the years and it was time for me to start learning to be independent. By
August 2013, my parents finally allowed me to live on my own and give me the
freedom that I needed. Me and my boyfriend had a lot of issues and fought a lot
of times but I did not have the courage to let go. I experienced both emotional
and physical pain. There was even a time that I sprained my ankle because of my
foolishness. In Oct 2013,
I did a strict low-calorie diet for 6 months and lost 20 pounds. I thought that
it could improve the relationship but I was wrong. I was also not happy that I sacrificed my time
with my family and put more priority into my relationship. By July 4, 2014, I gathered up the courage
and decided to finally end it. It was not an easy decision ending a 5-year relationship and at 30 years
old. For an entire year, I kept myself preoccupied by exercising and watching
Korean dramas. It was a heartbreaking experience for me but
until now I have no regrets. It brought about so many blessings in my life.
My primary
focus became my family, especially my nephew. I was able to restore the trust
of my parents. It was through that experience that my mom became open in
attending CCF with me, and eventually my dad as well. I decided to be active
again in church by volunteering for the technical ministry in Victory. During
prayer and fasting last Jan 2015, I was informed of an opportunity to work in a
new project/location and I gladly took on the challenge. It was a step of faith
for me to leave my comfort zone of 8 years. I was praying for a small group and
was able to attend a CCF bible study (which I saw in Facebook). I was even
surprised to discover that several people who I interacted with at work were also
believers. God never failed to surprise me. It was truly a blessing to have a
spiritual family wherever I go. There were many firsts for me in 2015,
commuting and experienced night shift for a month, seeing an old friend have
that thirst for a relationship with God, were a few of them. I had simple joys
knowing that I can step out in faith and know that God is always with me. By
July 2015, I received another answered prayer and was promoted as the team lead
for the project. I was humbled because I was chosen even though there were
others who were in the project longer than I. I am also thankful that I was given an opportunity to adjust my schedule at
work, so that I can be more active in ministry. Last Dec 2015, my mom and I
started attending WOW Thursdays and are now part of a small group.
With
regards to Glaucoma, there are improvements for both eyes for the past 15
years. Currently, I only have 1 eye drop medication and my eye pressure is
constant at 8.
God slowly
changed my heart and I am so overwhelmed with His presence in my life and my
family. God has placed a burned in my heart to reach out to other people. He is also constantly guiding me on things or
people that need to hold on to or let go. Me and my family are still works in
progress and are improving our ways to communicate better with each other.
Life
verses:
Psalm 91:2
“I will say
of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God,
in whom I trust.”
Philippians 4:13 “I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”
Romans 12:2 “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be
transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and
approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”
1 Timothy 4:12 “Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young,
but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith
and in purity.”
1 Peter 5:7 “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”
1 John 4:18 “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear,
because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect
in love.”
Colossians 3:12 “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly
loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and
patience.”
Hebrews 10:19-25 ESV
Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the holy places
by the blood of Jesus, by the new and living way that he opened for us through
the curtain, that is, through his flesh, and since we have a great priest over
the house of God, let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of
faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies
washed with pure water. Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without
wavering, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how to stir up
one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the
habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day
drawing near.
Life if I
didn’t come to know Christ
My life
would have no direction and I would still be relying on my own strength.
My focus
would be on worldly pleasures and would still remain full of insecurities.